American Dream change ; The house, cars, picket fence, dog, kids….maybe not the kids

Posted: August 6, 2013 in Children, Health
Tags: , , , , , , ,

baby cryingThis piece is regarding the upcoming article in Time magazine featuring the subject of why more adults particularly women do not want to have children. I myself at one time did not want kids. I thought raising kids in this country with all the racism, child molesters and other dangers that keep parents up would be too much.

During the 1970’s the number of childless women averaged about one in ten and today that number is closer to one in five. There are a lot of reasons why people are deciding not to have kids. Money is the most outspoken one to mention. It roughly costs 1.1 million dollars to raise a child from birth to age 15 on average. Some people think of individuals who do not have children as selfish. When CBS news featured an article on childless women. A woman by the name of Tracy Ellen Kamens expressed her feelings by saying “I’d rather make a mistake and not have a child rather than have a child and realize it was a mistake.”

Economists fear this drought of babies being born. The replacement rate is the average number of babies a women needs to have to keep the population stable. The replacement rate is roughly 2.1 and we are not at a rate of 1.9. The fear is that with the smaller population of babies there will not be enough young working citizens to support government programs like social security and medicare for the older generation. Some people don’t want to have kids cause they’ve seen their family struggle or friends with kids and seen the effects of the long nights of the baby crying all night long, the kids constantly fighting over toys and other stuff. Of course there those kids who seem to run a muck in restaurants, malls, churches and other public venues. Keep in mind when you think to yourself “Boy!, I’m glad those aren’t my kids” remember they are someones kids.

Personally I don’t like it when people have kids who can’t take of them and know they never had the means to do so. I know girls out there who had kids to avoid working or had kids so they can collect money from the guy while they sit at home. The cases are far and few between but it does happen. Some people want to focus on work or school, some may not be able to have kids medically.

It’s not just in the US this is an issue. Countries like Italy, Switzerland have a one in four rate of women having children. Their governments have even tried cash awards, tax credits to try to increase the child bearing rate. Between the 1970’s to 2008 the age most women were having children increased from 24 – 28 and European countries like Germany, Italy, Switzerland is 30 years of age on average. The fact that more women are waiting to have kids make it harder for them to when they decide to have kids.

With the age steadily getting later and later for women. Economists predict that the population of childless women age 65 will quadruple over the next four decades. The main concern for the government is the ability to bounce back from a recession if the workforce isn’t adequate enough under the strain of unemployment, medicare, social security, welfare and other government backed programs.

Even this statistics and forecasting are not enough to make some women become future mothers. Even celebrities such as George Clooney, Oprah, Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Aniston, Winona Ryder, Jessica Biel, Margaret Cho, Eva Mendes, Jay Leno, Kim Cantrall, Kylie Monogue, Rachael Ray, Chelsea Handler and Janeane Garofolo to name a few are among the segments of those with childless lifestyles.

So my question to you is do you think women who do not want children are selfish?

Do you think they are just nervous about raising kids?

Are there instances when someone should not be a parent?

I love being a father,BUT there are times when my newborn is crying(right now for instance) and my oldest and middle ones are fighting over a toy. When there is marker all over the walls, spilled food on the floor I can understand in that moment its rough on us parents. Its often a thankless job and no matter how late I’m up the kids will be up early no matter what.

On the other hand I met people who say their life changed for the better when they found out they were pregnant or saw their baby for the first time. I myself fainted the first time I saw my baby girl coming out the womb. To me there is nothing to replace that moment(before I passed out not being unconscious). When you come home from work knowing your child will be there to greet you with a hug and smile is gratifying. In the end it is all your choice.

  1. I dont want to have children. And the excuse for breeding in order to prop up the aging population is just stupid in my opinion… There’s a simple solution to that, increase immigration. The global population will be at 9 billion by 2050, we need to start thinking globally, not locally. Having children needs to be an educated decision, not just an assumed part of everyone’s life.

    • I love your suggestion. I think it gives a new reason for the immigration bill to be brought to Washington. We need more outside of the box thinking for our problems. Thank you for your insight

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