Stripper                               Phone Sex In the last part of this two-part blog, I talked about the controversy surrounding pornography and prostitution and the pros and cons of both professions. The next two parts I want to talk about are two other sex driven industries that do not include physical sexual intercourse in their day-to-day practices. The next industries I want to discuss are phone sex operators and strippers. I explained my history with going to strip clubs in my youth and I even had a system after becoming a vet so I wouldn’t go broke all the time. I brung $60 dollars $20 dollars were for drinks and tips for the girls and the other $40 dollars was for one to two dances for the girl who caught my eye. At that time most places were $20 dollars for a dance. I am guilty of spending whole paychecks at a time if girl talked a good game to me and I was particularly lascivious that night.

Stripping Let’s forget my experience for a second with going to strip clubs and talk about the psychological effects of the profession on an individual. In an article I read about a feminist who called into a radio station to oppose gentleman’s clubs. Her view was that it was degrading to women and treated them unfairly. On the other side of the argument was a female strip club owner who says that those types of clubs are harmless fun and also natural. I had a girlfriend whose grandmother owned her in-house strip club, another story for another time.  A scientific study conducted by Daniel Downs and Gloria Cowan of California State University in 2006. The study reviewed 40 exotic dancers and another 40 young females who did not strip for a living. What they found during the interviews, surveys validated there hypotheses :

  • Strippers had remarkably less satisfaction from their personal relationships and were more likely to think their romantic partnerships would fail
  • There was no difference in self-esteem between strippers and non-strippers
  • Strippers prized their physical appearance over and above their other qualities and abilities.
  • If a stripper felt their body was not beautiful enough, their self-esteem would be affected.
  • Strippers seemed to be slightly less satisfied with their body and were more likely to scrutinize their physical appearance. More often they would “be ashamed if people knew what I really weigh”.

The evidence supported the strip club owner that there was not hard evidence suggesting that exotic dancers do not suffer any loss of self-esteem of sense of self-worth. While the findings suggesting strippers tend to be preoccupied with their bodies the sample size of the survey was still too small to determine with absolution. Plus, the strippers were older than the girls who didn’t strip. Honestly to add on to what the article suggests, is don’t forget industries such fitness and health, entertainment such as ballet, stage dancers, sport figures and athletes are also industries that focus highly on the physical appearance of an individual’s body. Now I want to look at a personal account of stripping and a woman’s own personal experience. One woman’s experience is that in the strip clubs a lot of places let you make your own schedule. She also mentions even though a lot of guys come on weekends, they may not be spending any real money and the weekdays can make you a lot of money if someone is the patient.

Money is also a driving force for most strippers and they can make a lot of it in a very short amount of time. This quick abundance of cash can give off a sudden independence and self-gratitude. The girl also mentions that the scheduling allows for freedom for vacations and traveling even if it is to go to other strip clubs as long as advance notice is given. She even gives times of the year where the best places to go are. For example, during the winter months, she says to go to Miami, during the summer, Boston, NY and Chicago and even going to Japan because the Japanese love American women and will pay top dollar. Avoid Philippines and Thailand, because they don’t adhere to the same laws and rules as America. The girl mentions that if girls work the higher end clubs and hustle they can make upwards to about $250,000 dollars a year or more. Who’s can see the downside to that it all sounds magical right? Well, now it’s time to bring you down to reality.

The first downside, she notes is that once you have worked in the industry for a while you can fall into a sad and depressing state of mind and ask yourself, What am I doing with my life? She also mentions it is hard to relate to people outside of stripping and that even strippers with all the money find themselves counting down till it’s time to leave for good. Another downside that she found was having all the money, but not doing anything to improve herself such as school, etc.  The girl of the article notes that the depression can spark from not being “picked” if a guy rejects you for another girl and you may find yourself wanting to drink more and more. One other thing she pointed out was the number of girls she saw who were single, divorced or in unhappy relationships because their significant other couldn’t handle their profession. Stick to a schedule and keep your personal life a priority among anything else. In the Sydney Morning Herald I read an article by Winnie, who to me represents a large portion who finds themselves being looked at backwards and not accepting of the current times, because they don’t want to be objectified nor do they want to look at other women going through that at strip clubs.

If a  woman voices her opinion about not wanting to go out for a night of ogling another woman’s rack while their date is entranced by the assortment of women’s stature. The fact is our culture has become more and more sex-crazed and we forget there was a time where going to strip clubs wasn’t popular and it was just a guys night out. The time it moment it became dinner plans between a newly dating couple or even some that are long-term is beyond me. There’s a gentleman’s club in Las Vegas called Deja Vu has some of their dancers aboard a specially equipped truck with a pole and a see through window that drives up and down Las Vegas Boulevard nightly. The idea was brought about to bring more customers and it has paid off immensely. “It’s about the bottom line and putting customers in the club,” said Larry Beard with Deja Vu. “We are in a recession, so every little bit of business helps.” “We thought it was a good idea, but the response has been overwhelming compared to what we thought it would be,” said Beard. What an awesome idea. I wish I would have thought of it. Marketing at its best,” said Deja Vu dancer Kay.  County Commissioner Steve Sisolak does pose the problem of driver distraction that the stripper mobile has for other drivers on the road.

The Commissioner even wants to make it a matter for the sheriff and DA’s office. “The driver looks over at it and goes up the sidewalk and plows down 12 people, we are going to have a real problem,” he said. They are trying to find opposition legally that this form of advertisement is allowed or that it can be stopped. “I’d like the operation to cease or at least put it in a more appropriate location,” he said. The nightclub says to be mindful of families on the Strip they only have the truck out between 10 p.m. and 2 a.m.

Phone Sex- Have you ever thought about becoming a phone sex operator? I remember telling a friend of mine she had a sexy phone sex voice and to use it to her advantage and make some money. Honestly the girl was no stranger to being a sexual deviant and I thought since she needed the money anyway, it might be a job she would be naturally good at. She said she called a place I looked up to her, but she didn’t want to do it. I know there are some of you out there who think they might be a good candidate for such a job. Well, let me give some pros and cons from some people who have lived the life and can tell their story.  I found a blog online where parents share stories and give their perspective and assistance with different problems. Well a topic of discussion was the good and bad about being a phone sex operator. Emily’s perspective was positive by saying with a legit company phone sex operator can make good money. She says she made $650 dollars in a day and if you get a “normal” guy the conversation was fun for her. The company she worked for let her log in and out as she pleased, but says a lot of the places have set hours.

You can also receive tips the Emily adds.  On the other side Emily did add negative point that she was grossed out by guys wanting to speak with girls young and I mean grade school young. Sometimes, guys call just to talk, the bad part is in a business where they pay for their talk time they can run over their minutes and still just be talking. Some companies Emily adds can pay very little and you will work long hours. She mention that guys can sometimes become mad if you don’t meet them for sex after talking with them and keep in mind your in competition with 300 plus girls all wanting the same guy to spend his money on their phone time.

Emily also talks about not knowing who will call and the fact that some girls can be logged in for hours and not get one call all day long. You also have to have a dirty mind to keep interested. Another blogger who had 5 years in the game said her experiences were more positive than negative and the guys she talked to weren’t disgusting or child molestors, but guys who enjoyed the company the voice of a woman who could provide a fantasy. I look at like this guy have you ever tried to watch a porno with no volume? Was it as sexually arousing as watching it with the sound on? We use all our senses for arousal and they say men are sexual beings and that we are visual creatures, but at least in my case it’s what I hear that makes a difference and stimulates me.

Dr. Justin R. Garcia an Evolutionary Biologist with Kinsey Institute at Indiana University confirms my belief. “We know that sound is really important during sex,” he said. Indeed, a quick online search unveiled a study by James M Dabbs of Georgia State University showing that the pupils of both males and females dilate more in response to sexual auditory stimuli than to other kinds. Garcia explained that we use sound to direct sexual energy and to communicate a sense of pleasure. “A big part of this is performance-based, and that’s not a bad thing — that’s just a reality of sex,” Honestly though there is a rise of women joining the ranks of phone sex operators. Melanie is another example of someone who left her rat race corporate job to work for herself as a phone sex operator. Noticing the trend of increasing jobs at home where the markets have increased 14% overall from 2001 is extraordinary. Melanie mentions speaking with someone who brings her attention of mothers who are on the rise for this line of work, because it gives them more time with the kids at home. Melanie, who called herself “Pussy Willow” who already had a clientage on her first time as an operator. She thought of some advice she was given to help her with the day:“Being a phone sex operator is like Russian roulette in that you never know what you’re going to get.

One client might want me to tell him to swallow his own semen because he’s totally into humiliation, and an hour later I could be blowing up balloons for another guy.” Dr. Garcia goes on to say that all senses are tantalized during sex.  Visual, auditory, gustatory, olfactory, and tactile. When it comes to which aspect of our sensory system is most important during sex, he offers a hypothetical: “Consider a silent sensual massage versus clumsy petting accompanied by sexy talk. The two are hard to compare for obvious reasons.” Since the quality of stimuli and individual preferences can vary so widely, it’s impossible to make blanket statements. According to ratracerebellion.com in 2011 within 18 months the rate of mothers of young children becoming phone sex operators jumped 400%. Chris Dunst CEO of the company adds: “Most sound a little embarrassed,” she told “Good Morning America” of the moms who reach out to her, in search of phone sex work.” “They say, ‘I’ve tried everything. It’s come to the point my family is on food stamps.

We can’t make the rent and are facing foreclosure. This is the fastest way for me to get my family back on my feet again.'” “There was a lot of having to get used to just, you know, the weirdos out there,” she said. “There is basically anything you could think of. There’s married men with children. There’s divorced men. Sometimes, every once in a while, there’s a couple that’ll call,” she said. “More recently, there’s actually been a few women calling.” Women can make anywhere from $10 – $50 dollars an hour and sometimes more than that. According to Chris Dunst many of the phone sex companies offer direct deposit, flexible hours around the individual’s schedule, free training and gift card deposit if someone doesn’t have  bank account.

The idea of these phone sex operators being bad mother all depends on who you ask. “It’s probably not the most appropriate,” said another, when asked by “GMA” whether she thought it was acceptable for the mother of a young child to get paid to speak intimately with strangers. “I get to spend time with my son,” she said. “I have to go into the office when I work, but the office is just one room away from my living room. I take calls for half-a-hour and I’m back to my son again.” “Your priority as a mother is to financially and emotionally be there for your children,” mom-of-three, Lynn, told “GMA.” “Phone sex helps me provide financial support for them.”

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